thephantomsangel

I feel so bad for my future children because it's constantly going to be like

  • Me when my kid is crying: Don’t cry for me, Argentinaaaaaaaaaaa….
  • Me when my kids are helping me clean: IT’S THE HARD KNOCK LIFE FOR US
  • Me eating breakfast with my kids: The other one’s still the toast of the town ‘cause he made butter outta cream…
  • Me playing hide and go seek with my kids: SO IF YOU CARE TO FIND ME, LOOOOOK TO THE WESTERN SKY!!
  • Me waking my kids up in the morning: Maybe we can frighten away the ghost of so many years with a little ILLUMINATION *flicks on lights*
  • Me when my kid has a crush: SHE’S IN LOOOOOOVEEEEEEE, SHE’S IN LOOOOOOOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
  • Me when my kid tries to run away: THEREEEEE, OUT IN THE DARKNESSSSSS… A FUGITIVE RUNNINGGGG…
  • Me giving my kids advice: If you only follow your heart…
  • Me when my kid gets their first boyfriend/girlfriend: OMIGOD OMIGOD YOU GUYS
  • Me when my kids are mad at me: TAKE ME BAAAABBBYYYYYYY, OR LEAVE MEEEEEEEE
  • Me giving my kids ‘the talk’: Once there was a night, beneath a moonless sky…
  • Me when my kids start driving: GOOOOOO GREASE LIGHTNING YOU BURNING UP THE QUARTER MILEEEEEEE
  • Me when my kids go off to college: Empty chairs and empty tables, where my friends will meet no more…